Well…I was planning to go live in France, but plans change, and as the French would say, “c’est la vie”. Oh, I could get the visa to be a long-stay visitor, but what about how much the rent on anything nice costs once I get there? What about the other little luxuries I love in life? How will I afford those, especially without being allowed to work until I naturalize (or, less likely, get a job offer)? And what about naturalization? I would like to become a citizen someday, yet the naturalization process in France takes five years. Which is ominous.
The National Rally, an avowed anti-immigrant movement, are closing in on 50% in polls for the second round of the next presidential election in 2027; it seems unlikely they’d come in with an absolute majority in the parliament even if they did manage to elect a president, but this isn’t the most secure environment for a newcomer to want to become a citizen in, particularly once you consider that the forces of the “center” have a habit of appeasing the far right by adopting their policies. Which admittedly haven’t said much of anything about restricting naturalization for long-stay visitors who are financially self-sufficient; by the fundamentals I’d be one of the last immigrants anybody would want to target.
But one would say the same about ethnic Italians who were born Italian citizens in the diaspora as far as the Italian far right is concerned, yet the current far-right regime has issued a decree stripping me of my citizenship. So I honestly just don’t trust these people.
I certainly don’t trust them to keep their word for five years. As opposed to pulling the rug out from under me midway; notably if I started this year I’d be naturalizing maybe in 2030, and the next French presidential election is in 2027. Hmm. To say nothing of the requirements to naturalize in the first place: B1-level French is basic-level fluency in the language, for those unfamiliar with these language classification levels. And I start with extremely little French skills. However, five years is a long time; I’m sure if I were in France and made the effort I could achieve B1 well within five years. They also want evidence of “integration” into French society and culture, which as far as I know after extensive research is a bar I could clear if I participated to the extent I like to in America.
But it’s a rather subjective assessment and in my life I have not historically done well in such situations: I tend to get anything only in settings where anyone can get in, there are clear rules, and no discretion is needed (or even allowed). Again, I think I can do it, but it’s all a bit iffy.
To say nothing of what my life would be like in France; looking at the price range that I could get on my investment income alone, there are rentals (even on Airbnb!) that I could afford, but unless I’m spending half or more of my income on rent I’m not going to get any sort of lodging that I’d actually like to live in. And I’d be at the bottom of the housing market, and hence I would accrete low social status: there won’t be hosting any parties with high-status high-quality people in the sort of rental I could get on, say, $800 a month, even in a town in the French Alps well outside Chamonix. And there won’t be much left in the budget for fun or luxuries: yes, I could get by, but it would be just scraping by, the same existence I got sick to death of when I was a child.
I love France, if we’re being honest…but I think what I really love is the version of France I got with a $1000 a night room and a $5000 a night escort in the town of Chamonix itself. The scrimp, save, struggle, and suffer version of France is not going to be nearly as beloved.
So what’s a person to do? Well…going back to square one, what I really need is a country that’s not America, that has far lower prices than France, and that has spectacular landscapes, pleasant climates, European-style culture, all the fun little luxuries I love to treat myself to, ideally is full of attractive white European people, and even more ideally is easy to immigrate to and naturalize in. And there’s one country that answers to that description: Argentina. 🇦🇷
Everyone has heard of Buenos Aires, but Patagonia in particular offers cool, dry climates, spectacular landscapes, horseback riding, skiing, snowboarding, wine tasting, and some of the best steaks in the world…and the prices for long-term rentals is a tenth of California’s. Yes, that’s literally true: a tenth. If listings are to be believed you can easily find entire homes in locations convenient to town and ski resorts with modern amenities that actually look nice to live in for $300 a month. Splurge and spend $600 a month and you can have a nice place in the middle of downtown Bariloche, which by all indications is a pleasant alpine-style ski town. Steak dinners and wine bottles run perhaps a third of what Americans are used to paying. Massages, botox, filler, spa treatments, top-grade health care? Maybe a quarter of US prices these days. Even the skiing and horseback riding is much cheaper.
In large measure this is because Argentina has suffered an economic depression and currency crisis in recent years, but the point is if you have independent income in US dollars that could scrape by in a place like Wheeling, West Virginia, you’ll be living very well anywhere in Argentina (Bariloche is actually one of their more expensive areas, by the way, along with Buenos Aires…and it’s still that affordable!).
The requirements to immigrate aren’t too daunting either. I’ll need to take my US passport of course, but before I fly away I’ll need to get new certified copies of my birth certificate and name change order, get them apostilled, and also get an FBI background check and have that apostilled. I’ll need health coverage as well but for expats in Argentina that’s cheap and easy to get. I’ll also need proof of means (for the visa I want I need to be financially self-sufficient, and I won’t be allowed to work, so that’s essential; no worries, since I make multiples of the minimum requirement)…and that’s about it.
I can then fly into Argentina on my US passport as a tourist…but I won’t be able to get my visa then! After I arrive I will need to secure a lease on a long-term rental, and then have everything translated into Spanish by a public translator certified by Argentina. It’s highly recommended to do these parts after you arrive in the country, by the way, since there aren’t a lot of Argentine-certified public translators creeping around abroad. Hah! But this is good, because unlike France it’s actually standard in Argentina to apply for a residency visa after you arrive in the country, as opposed to having to have proof of accommodations before you visit the country that you submit to a consulate in your own country. In Argentina’s system you can just show up and *gasp* actually look at the rentals before you sign a lease, without having to fly back to your own country and then back to theirs; much more efficient.
Once you’re in your rental you’re leasing, you submit your application for a residency visa to the government, and they issue you a temporary residency permit while your application is pending. Usually that will take a few months, and in my case I’m virtually certain to be approved. At that point I can stay there for a year, and renew it for the next year.
The fancy part is that after two years of residency in the country I could naturalize as an Argentine citizen. Yes, you read that right: two years. That’s all they require. And it counts down from the moment you establish residency, no matter if it’s permanent or temporary, or on what kind of visa. They require some modicum of integration into Argentine society, but basic-level Spanish and any effort at all to live like a normal person in the country will be more than sufficient for a judge to grant you citizenship.
My plan of working up to at least conversational, if not fluent Argentine Spanish through regular engagement with language exchange programs and classes, along with participating in activities relating to dance, horses, wine, and skiing, would easily clear the bar that’s required.
Two years is also a lot less time for anything to go wrong as far as adverse changes in law are concerned: I’m planning to emigrate this summer, so by summer 2027 I could have an Argentine passport in hand. In France we’d be talking about 2030 at best. Of course a European Union passport is what I’d really want…but for the moment I want to get out of the United States, acquire a second citizenship, and have an adventure where I can live well on the way on the resources I have already. And that’s going to be much easier in South America than in Europe.
The two year timeline is also so much less dreadful than the five years for France as well: instead of drudging along desperately trying to prove I’m “integrated” enough and hope the laws don’t change out from under me as I scrape by in one location, I could live my life like a normal person, immerse myself in the culture, roam all the way around the country (notably I love the vast landscapes and long road trips of the American West, and Patagonia has that in spades), and have fun…the two years would practically fly by, like they’re an adventure.
And I come out with a second passport at the end of it, and at that point I could go try on France for size, go back to the United States (I have my eye on Alaska as a place to establish a career…), or even start a business in Argentina. Notably rents for small commercial spaces somewhere like Bariloche are similarly low as the houses: $300 a month will get you a nice little shop in town. That’s in the realm of not “hey, maybe if I stretch myself and beg the banks for mercy I can get a foothold and maybe figure something out if I get really lucky?” to “of course I could easily do this”. The people in America who have grandpa’s six-figure pensions backing their business and paying for all the start-up capital of establishing a physical space, giving them runway to figure something out and a cushion in case something goes wrong? That will never be me in America, but in Argentina, I have enough. That can be me. So perhaps I can still have my dream dance studio or some such in South America, after I naturalize as a citizen.
Of course there are some pitfalls: Argentina is consistently rated as one of the worst places in the world to do business. I might do well anyway for all I know, but even if Argentina proves impossible, as an Argentine citizen you have access to a nifty bloc called “MERCOSUR”, which grants you the right to live and work in a variety of countries across South America. Yes, if you’re an Argentine and you want to live and work in Brazil, for example, you can! Most notably, for someone who wants a dance studio, coffee shop, or some space like that in ski country or on the beach, Chile is in that geographic and climate zone, it’s part of MERCOSUR, and it’s consistently rated as a good place to do business…and living costs there aren’t that much higher than in Argentina.
Even more geographic and political bonuses open up for Argentines: Argentina, specifically Ushuaia in the far south of the country, is the usual jumping-off point for cruises to Antarctica, and an Antarctic cruise is something I’ve always wanted to do since childhood. Living in Argentina, I could go somewhat frequently and more affordably than I could hope to do otherwise (having to fly into the country, as opposed to just driving my car to Ushuaia). And, perhaps most intriguingly, Argentine citizens enjoy visa-free access to not only the Schengen Area in Europe but also China and Russia. Yes, really.
China dropped their visa requirements for Argentines (as well as several other “global south” countries) very recently, and it’s an experimental one-year program, but the Chinese government have in recent years trialed going visa-free for certain friendly nationalities and they have tended to extend these measures or even make them permanent, so there’s a decent chance that after I naturalize as an Argentine I wouldn’t even need a visa to visit the People’s Republic of China.
Russia too grants visa-free access to Argentine citizens, and has for a long time: just show up with your Argentine passport as a tourist and you’re good to go. A stark contrast to the restrictions US passport holders have to endure. I wouldn’t want to go to Russia anyway under current circumstances (there’s a war on!), but after the war is over, geopolitical tensions between Russia and the US will likely still be high, the environment hostile for those entering on US passports…but for those entering on Argentine passports, the risk is minimal. If you’re a US citizen as well as an Argentine citizen there is of course always a chance a deep background check would reveal you’re an American as well, which does raise the risk…but the chances that any such check would be performed or anything would happen as a result of it are very low. Really, the risks are minimal and in my view acceptable. So my dream of going to Saint Petersburg and then riding the legendary trans-Siberian route? Possible, once again.
So France might be a dream, but, for the moment, Argentina seems to be a perfect fit for my needs. Fair warning: I’ve never even visited the country before, but I’m told based on my experiences in Europe as well as the American West that if I like the American West frontier landscape as well as European culture and people that I’d love Patagonia.
In some ways Argentina even presents itself as being closer to the California Dream that I wanted to live than anything I could actually get in modern-day California…which, if it were true, would be wild. Time will tell if it’s real or but a mirage, but I won’t have to wait for long: by July everything should be ready. I can’t wait to go and see it all in person…